Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Give you one more minute of my time in this mess you left behind

Well, it's offical. I signed the memo today offically asking for a voluntary demotion to librarian.

I am just a muddle of emotions. But I have to do what will make me happy. Life is too short to be unhappy.

I've decided to stop focusing so much on my outward life. There has just been so much going on with P and job stuff. Which has mostly been resolved... she is moving out of here and I am starting my new one on the 15th.

Things have happened that caused me to reevaluate myself. I've decided that stress makes me cry. I cry at the drop of a hat. But it isn't always the right thing for me. It isn't that I am always sad. It is that I don't communicate what I am feeling and attempt to hold it in until I cry. It is an emotional release. But it doesn't truly communicate always how I feel. So I am trying to take a breath when I feel the need to cry and communicate what I am feeling.

The other thing I am working on is my weight and eating right. I tend to eat even when I am not hungry. I am trying to learn what just enough is. I am surprised at how difficult it is. I am also trying to stop and figure what is the reason I am eating if it is not hunger. Plus I am working on adding more exercise into my life. I went walking with H. Sunday night and I'd like to go two more times this week.

Right now I am still considering therapy. I had thought about it before when the first distressing things came out about P. But I am going to try it my way first.

Good day and start here. Go anywhere.

3 comments:

John Cowart said...

Sounds like you are making some wise decisions. I wish you joy.

Donald said...

Do the therapy, you need it! ;-)

On a serious note, it can help and it does. If anything helps give perspective and helps by having to explain to a thrid party what's going on. I did it after I got divorced and it really does help. Not everything I talked about/planned happened or worked out like I thought it would, so Don't worry about it if it doesn't.

Pat said...

Hi! I dropped by via your Dads blog. You think you were describing yourself in this post - but acutally you were describing me! How did you know?
The eating, the crying - not expressing ourselves...I think I need therapy too. I wish you peace and contentment - I think you've got it together even more then you realize.